🐕 Leadership in Dog Training: Don’t Be a Dick

Let’s talk about leadership in dog training—because that word gets thrown around a lot, and frankly, I’m sick of seeing it used as an excuse for abuse.

Leadership does not mean dominating your dog. It doesn’t mean pushing them around, being loud, bossy, or acting like some alpha wolf with a superiority complex. If your idea of leadership is being a dick to your dog, you’re not leading—you’re bullying.

Dogs should be enjoying training!

💢 Calling It Like It Is

I see way too many trainers online preaching “leadership,” but their videos look like tantrums disguised as training. Shouting at a dog, jerking the leash, shoving them around, standing over them with puffed-up bravado—it’s not leadership. It’s ego.

Let me put it this way: if your response to a bratty or bossy dog is to become more bratty and bossy, congratulations—you’ve just made yourself the same kind of problem you were trying to fix.

🧒 Would You Parent Like That?

Think about it in terms of parenting. We all want to be good leaders for our kids. We want them to listen, feel safe, and grow into balanced, confident adults. But no one (or at least no one we should be taking notes from) is dominating their kids, screaming over minor mistakes, or physically manhandling them to “prove a point.”

You can lead with love. You can correct bad behavior without damaging the relationship. And the same goes for dogs.

A boy and his dog, sometimes we parent both!

🧭 Real Leadership Looks Like This:

• Saying yes when the dog is right, and no when they’re wrong

• Correcting behavior, not punishing emotion

• Acting as a calm role model, not an emotional wreck

• Setting clear boundaries and reinforcing them consistently

• Being a source of safety, especially when the dog is anxious or overwhelmed

• Using tools like the leash, e-collar, or crate to guide and support, not punish

When your dog panics over something, your job isn’t to match their chaos. It’s to stay grounded so they can take their cues from your calm.

🛠️ Tools Don’t Train the Dog—

You do!

We’re big advocates for the proper use of training tools. When used correctly, things like e-collars, prong collars, crates, and leashes are communication tools. They help bridge the gap between what we want and what the dog understands.

But here’s the problem: too many people use tools as a shortcut to control or a way to vent their frustration. That doesn’t make you look like a professional—it makes all dog trainers look bad.

Let me be clear: a correction without context or redirection is a dick move.

A real correction involves:

• Timing

• Clarity

• Immediate redirection to the behavior we do want

  That’s how a dog learns. Not by being yanked around with no explanation.

Leashes and treats are training tools. Yes, just like slip leads, E-collars, and other items deemed "scary"

🚨 Structure ≠ Micromanagement

Structure is essential. Dogs thrive with rules, routines, and guidance. But some trainers take structure so far it becomes micromanagement—and then slap the word “leadership” on it to justify the nonsense.

Yes:

• Dogs need crate time

• They need supervision

• They need clear expectations

But let’s not get ridiculous. Letting your dog on the couch isn’t a leadership failure.

If your dog jumps up, snuggles in, and relaxes—and isn’t guarding it, growling, or turning into a gremlin—you’re probably fine. “Dominance” isn’t lurking in every behavior.

❌ Myth-Busting: Not Every Dog Wants to Be the Boss

The idea that all dogs are secretly plotting to dominate their humans? Total crap. Most dogs aren’t trying to overthrow your household—they’re just confused about the rules. If you’re seeing behavior issues, it’s more often a lack of clarity or leadership than a power struggle.

Jumping on guests doesn’t mean your dog thinks they’re king of the house. It means they haven’t learned boundaries yet. And that’s on us, not them.

💬 Final Thoughts: Don’t Be a Dick. Be a Leader.

Leadership is not about showing your dog who’s boss.

It’s about showing them who’s calm, who’s consistent, and who’s worth following.

You can be firm without being harsh.

You can be structured without being controlling.

You can give a correction without being cruel.

And if you’re out there using “leadership” as an excuse to be rough, loud, or emotionally reactive toward your dog, then this message is for you:

Do better. Don’t be a dick.

We only have them for a certain amount of time, lets not spend it being a jerk.